Elizabeth A. Douglas, Esq. – Founder & CEO of Douglas Family Law Group, PLLC – Super Lawyer 2019, 2020, 2021, 2022, 2023.
As a family law attorney, I have dealt with clients who are leaders and business executives across industries. Through this, I have come to understand the significance of striking a balance between transparency and professionalism when communicating about personal matters, such as divorce or family law litigation, while in a leadership position. It is crucial for leaders to navigate these conversations with grace and diplomacy while considering the potential impact on their clients, friends and families.
Effectively managing or leading a business while dealing with personal challenges requires a profound understanding of the emotional aspects involved in such cases, coupled with the ability to provide clear and objective guidance. By maintaining open lines of communication, demonstrating empathy and offering sound legal advice, I have been able to ensure my clients feel supported while upholding the highest standards of professionalism as they navigate personal circumstances. Here is what I’ve learned along the way:
Remember, selective sharing is key.
Ultimately, the decision to disclose personal matters rests with the individual. Prioritizing one’s well-being and comfort level, and only sharing information that is necessary or appropriate in each specific context, is a key consideration. By striking the right balance between transparency and professionalism, you can navigate these conversations with confidence, preserve your privacy and maintain the trust and respect of those around you.
Take a moment to consider the relevance of sharing your personal circumstances with everyone in your life. When it comes to clients, it might be necessary to inform them if your divorce or family law case could potentially impact your ability to fulfill your professional obligations. However, with friends and family, the decision to disclose should be guided by the nature of your relationship and the level of support you seek.
Exercise caution and prudence when disclosing information about your personal circumstances. Strive to remain open while maintaining professional boundaries. Focus on sharing essential facts without delving into intimate or sensitive details of your divorce or family law case. This approach preserves your privacy and minimizes potential discomfort in your conversations.
Here is my suggested language to consider when starting this challenging conversation in a business setting: “I value our professional relationship immensely, which is why I wanted to personally address the challenges I’m currently facing. Although this situation is demanding, please know that I am fully dedicated to serving your needs. You can rely on me to deliver the same level of professionalism and expertise you’ve come to expect.”
Or, you might say, “I wanted to update you on a personal situation I’m currently navigating. While it may pose some personal challenges, I want to assure you that I have a strong support system in place to ensure our work together continues seamlessly. Your business will receive the same level of dedication and professionalism it always has.”
Choose the right setting.
Opt for private conversations rather than engaging in them in public settings. Creating a personal and controlled environment allows for more genuine connections and understanding. It also enables you to gauge the reactions of others and respond accordingly. Most importantly, it ensures your conversations are kept confidential and respectful.
Schedule a one-on-one meeting in a quiet, private location. For example, opt for a coffee shop or a business-centric hotel lobby with some private seating areas. This can ensure a confidential discussion away from office disruptions. Additionally, you can reserve private meeting rooms in libraries and co-working spaces, thus further expanding suitable options for productive and private conversations.
Maintain objectivity and professionalism.
This is paramount throughout this journey. No matter who you are conversing with, strive to present a balanced and objective viewpoint. Refrain from venting frustrations or making derogatory remarks about your former spouse or the legal process. Instead, emphasize your commitment to navigating the situation responsibly and ethically. By demonstrating professionalism, you not only protect your own reputation but also maintain trust and respect in your personal and professional relationships.
Set boundaries.
This is another crucial aspect of this balancing act. Clearly communicate your preference to keep discussions about your divorce or family law litigation separate from your professional or social interactions. Kindly request that others respect your boundaries. This way, you ensure conversations remain focused on the appropriate topics, which helps reduce the risk of misunderstandings or discomfort.
If you’re unsure of how to communicate when asked a specific question about your personal situation by a client or business associate, you can say, “I genuinely appreciate your care and interest in my well-being. However, the level of service I provide to you is of utmost importance to me. Moving forward, I kindly ask that we focus our conversations on matters directly related to our work together. I believe this will allow me to provide you with the highest level of service you expect and deserve.”
Consider professional support.
In times when the weight of personal circumstances feels overwhelming, remember that seeking professional support is not a sign of weakness but of strength. Consider engaging a therapist, counselor or support group to provide you with valuable insights and coping strategies. These professionals can help you navigate the emotional and practical aspects of your situation while maintaining professionalism in your business and personal life.
Be aware of your confidentiality obligations.
In New York State, maintaining the privacy and confidentiality of personal information related to family law or divorce issues is not only a matter of best practice but also a legal obligation for businesses and professionals. Familiarize yourself with the applicable laws and regulations in your specific state or country. Consult with your attorney to fully understand your rights and obligations, ensuring you navigate these circumstances responsibly and in compliance with the law.
By heeding this heartfelt advice, you can successfully balance professionalism with the challenges of family law litigation or divorce. Remember to nurture your personal well-being while maintaining the integrity of your professional life. You possess the strength and resilience to navigate this journey with grace and emerge stronger on the other side.
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